The Future is Ours. Safe, Fun and Connected
This theme for the week is about on-line safety for young people. There is also
Actionwork anti-bullying month 4th-29 Nov 2013
With the theme:
Creatively dealing with bullying using non-violence.
This is something I wish to address.
Why do some people become bullies and others victims? The bullies often work together. They gang up on someone and make his or her life a misery. The victim is often smaller, weaker or just less experienced.
Schools are expected to have anti-bullying policies. Some schools deny that bullying happens in that particular school. Human nature being what it is, it seems unlikely that bullying never happens.
Sometimes the staff have tendencies towards bullying and see this as normal behaviour. This does not help the victims. It is also difficult for other adults, whether members of staff or parents to put forward any kind of suggestions that something needs to change.
It seems as if the only way forward in these cases is to show how respect can be gained and maintained without resorting to bullying tactics. If only a few people treat people firmly, but kindly others may notice and see this as a better way.
I have been bullied. I was bullied for having a different accent. Perhaps I was bullied by people who were envious of me for whatever reason. I don’t know.
I have also been excluded by cliques of my own age as a teenager.
It would be wrong to say that these experiences have had no effect on me. However I do not believe that in the long term they have had a bad effect.
Recognising bullying is perhaps something I can do. I do not believe that people should conform to some standard of expected behaviour in order to avoid being bullied. For those who are able to have one accent at home and another in the playground, this may be a useful asset.
I think it is a shame that parents often feel obliged to keep their children up to date with all the latest electronic games and fashions, so that they are not teased or bullied. It is better to live within one’s means and to learn that the best things in life are free.
Regarding being left out, I know how hurtful that can be, especially to shy people, who are not able to make their presence felt. As a result, I try to notice people who need to be welcomed and introduced to others.
So bullying is a bad thing and should be discouraged. This requires training and time. Victims of bullying need not be permanently scarred by the experience.
I read a blog post about a family where a child had to wear spectacles and was prepared for being bullied by her parents. She was able to disarm the bullies by showing that she was not intimidated by them and by telling them their teasing was silly or unoriginal. (Unfortunately I have been unable to find it again.) Most bullies are cowards.
I have come across unhelpful behaviour on social networking sites. I asked a wiser person for advice. This was not to enter into argument with the person and to say something neutral but nice to them.
Related posts by others:-